This post may sound somewhat self-indulgent. I don’t care, it’s real.
From the heart of someone who has done most of what a lot of you guys out there are striving to do, if there is only one thing that I can teach, let it be this – BE STRONG.
Life is hard. You think a hangzhou girl not talking to you warrants being depressed, wait till you’re in a relationship and jealousy strikes, wait till you’re working hard and still wondering how to put ends together, wait till you have kids and face marriage counselling, etc.
Strength will get you (through) everything in life, and it’s the ONLY way that you will get solidly good with women in the end. SOLIDLY good that is, not flashy. So you got twelve numbers this week, so you went on three dates and slept with two of them – it means nothing unless you have found that strength inside you that would have dealt with not having any of that. A very attractive man can do all of the above in a day or two. It certainly doesn’t mean that he has kicker where it counts (a lot of really attractive guys are in fact terrible with women, despite having them, for this very reason).
A hangzhou girl gives you a nothing reply, you have a bad night out, you have a hangzhou girl flake on you – you can have a cry and stagnate in self-pity, or you can feel the twist of pain inside you and develop the ability that comes from deep inside your soul to stand up and say “I’m better than this! I deserve more!” See life like a shark – if you stop swimming, you’re dead. You need strength CONSTANTLY to brush off ANYTHING and keep moving forward. Life and goals will sort themselves out in your trail. Lack of strength stops your life force flowing. You get so scared of the pain that you do nothing. If you can’t walk away from a bad approach or a bad night, then you’re not ready for women – cos once you have one (or some), your precious little heart will be shattered. Life knows this, as do you on a deep level, and it will keep away what you WANT until what you learn what you NEED. How you feel right now WITHOUT women is exactly how you would feel WITH women (once the orgasmic glow wears off, which it inevitably does). And if you’ve not found that strength inside yourself to deal with crap, and to face tough times head on like a solider ready for war, you’re going to be buggered in the end either way – be it by her walking all over you, by you STILL feeling as helpless as you do now just in a relationship, by you not being able to deal with the other guys in her life, by you not being able to look after her emotionally like the man that she needs, etc etc.
Use this opportunity to DEVELOP that strength inside you NOW. I developed mine through heart shattering breakups, through thousands of approaches, rejections and shocking nights out. And I continue to do so now facing drama in my life. I’ve had some shit times, but that’s my point – looking back, I can see that my life only ever moved forward, and generally forward massively, when I summoned that warrior inside me that fought his way through. You can spot IMMEDIATELY people who have developed this in themselves. They radiate positivity and enthusiasm. They motivate themselves and others. They have drive and direction, dreams. They face life head on. But ironically, you don’t need any of this to be strong. Strength is the PRECURSER to all of it. If you learn to be strong, you learn the priceless gift of your own abundance. Unless you’re strong, you will never find true happiness in my opinion. You will be forever at the mercy of the elements.
Stop your whinging and bitching. If you complain a lot, if you’re “just a realist”, if you find the negatives in anything that you do – you have two choices. You can continue this path and think back on this in however long that it takes you to realise “Yeah wow, NOTHING has changed in my life” … OR you can decide now to accept that that FEAR – the one thing behind all of this – is OK. That you’re going to feel it and deal with it like a man. Courage is not the absence of fear but the ability to feel it and do something anyway. I’m not saying switch off from your emotions. Feel sadness, feel hatred, feel anger and frustration, hell even feel scared! What I’m saying is, own these emotions, don’t let them own you. House them like a tenant – let them in but keep them in check. Don’t let them smash the joint up. Stand up like a man and move forward. Pick up a shield and just walk, cos life will certainly shoot you some arrows. And if you can’t learn to block them during the march, you’re going to be annihilated once you get to the battle.
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